Giant Steps

I hang suspended

(...700 hertz)

Ain’t that just you
you know the facts, but you
haven’t got a clue
about me or my life, why don’t
you try and take the time
till then what am I supposed
to do? but then that’s just 
like you to leave me
I hang suspended on your
words, yeah you leave me 
I hang suspended on your words

don’t you care? I don’t read
minds and I did I’d be
elsewhere, tell me what’s on
your mind so I can rectify in
time, or else I won’t know 
what I’m to do, but then that’s
just like you to leave me

I hang suspended on your words

Upon 9th and fairchild

I don’t need you preachin’
Tellin’ me points of law
I got my own problems
trying to stay off the floor

as the vultures circle
and the bills and demands
fill the floor
it’s been 3 weeks and 3 days
since I last stepped out my door

this is my life too
this is mine

jesus this room’s so cold
but you’ve got your own problems
I can’t see an end to it all

Wish I was skinny

Wishin’ I was skinny
Wishin’ that the whole world knew my name
Wishin’ I was thrillin’, that I would never be
to blame, wishin’ I was kissin’ a girl with lips 
smooth as pearl, wishin’ I was pretty, wish that
I could twist the world round my finger, wishin’
I had money wishin’ for the time to spend it all,
wish that I could wrap the world round my finger,
but I would always love you, I guess that would 
never change.

Leaves and sand

Greet the world with tired
but something just ain’t right
head of dust and leaves and sand
creeping past your window
I can see the face of love and pain
behind your smile

always the same

rub my eyes try and use my mind
dull jewel inactive fire
come to terms with things at hand
creeping past my window
swore you smelt self-loathing
feeling shame you raised your smile

Butterfly McQueen

I’ve finally broke your cool!
leave my things just where they are
I didn’t think it would go this far
makes no sense no sense at all
that’s why this bird must fly away

Finally broke the rule!
butterfly you made me say
I’d never leave but I can’t stay
I’d never hurt you willingly
but it’s time this bird must fly away
bird must fly today
butterfly away

(butterfly speaks) 

what am I supposed to do now that
love’s gone away, take my life, take
my air, release me from this
body, I’ll go anywhere!

I feel you rising Butterfly McQueen

Rodney King (song for Lenny Bruce)

Do you know my name before you 
tear me apart?
Do you care who I am?

Thinking of ways

Just drop me here I can find my way clear back to my house, I’m finding
it hard trying to stay on my feet on
my own i’m thinking of ways I can
get out of things just like always
with a head full of beer I will try
and tell someone tonight
I gotta get away step on the gas
go giles! (go, go)

... later
I’ll just have one more then I’ll have
to be going, someone’s waiting
I’ll just have one more, it can’t do
any harm anymore, I’m thinking
of ways I can get out of things
just like always with a head full of beer
I will try and tell someone tonight

Barney (... and me)

Now it’s getting colder
my hands chilled to the bone
I watch you breath and trace

it’s steps as it mingles with my
own. The lake is almost frozen
the grass is silver air
the wind is high in the blue sky
I wish that I could care.
I recall when we were younger
we shared the streets of home
spoke of our dreams and soaring
schemes and places we would
go, if I stay much longer
I’ll never leave again, I have to
move I cannot stay, believe the
voice that tells me leave it all 
behind me, I know that I know 
that I am wrong, I’ll never leave 
now it has been so long

and now I’m getting older, I still
can’t find the words to empathise
with what’s inside, express the way
I feel and now I’m getting older
It’s easier to hide, to run away
day after day betray the voice that tells me leave it all behind me, I
know that I know that I am wrong, I’ll 
never leave now it has been so long

Spun around

Keeling at the sink I’m reeling
waiting for the calm that can’t be found
I’ve swallowed all the pills, I’m cold
and the dreams are starting to take hold.

Thinking that this room is sinking
and my God is nowhere to be found
1,2,3,4 (backwards)

If you want it, take it

Call the cops and make it loud
nowhere to hide away
nothing to bribe them with
I’ve got nothing against not being
proud, to me it’s alright

grab what’s going and make it
mine, no sense in hanging
round waiting for hand-me downs
I don’t worry about being proud
as long as I’m alright

If you want it, make it yours
there’s nothing bright about being
undecided
If you want it, take it all
there’s nothing cool about having
to go without

Best lose the fear

The pure lights beckon
and the music calls
but you’re trapped inside
those four walls
it’s not your fault that
she has changed
it’s not her fault
you’re still the same
you both work hard
and you feel the pace
but you’re the one who
knows it’s not a race
to be won

and I know you’d like to disappear
you’d like to lose the fear
you dream the love you had
is near

you feel so down cos you
haven’t been out
your ears are still sore
from the latest bout 
something’s gonna have to change
arrangements must be re-arranged

and I know you’d like to disappear
you’d like to lose the fear
you dream the love you had
is near
you know you must go
but you’re frightened to leave
you’d love to stay but
you’re too scared to breathe

Take the time around

... and I think you know
I think you know my body’s achin’
so take the time to take your time
and feel the power surging through
let it wash all over you, feel it
breaking through, try to let it help
you understand

... take what you know
break it up and re-arrange it.

Lazarus

I must be losing my mind
I keep on trying to find a way out
but it’s ok you don’t lock the door anymore

I, you know I never go out
and you know that I start to forget things
but it’s ok they weren’t essential anyway

I, and when I start to look back
I feel like I’ve spent my whole life just kicking round
and not getting in the way

and now, and maybe now I should change
because I’m starting to lose all my faith
while those around me are beaten down each day.

One is for

One is for
Man is god
god is now
end is near pain
is good time is 
dear

Run my way runaway

Come fly, fasten seatbelts before we land
give it all up to the custom man
before we can leave we must go thru again
come ride the runaway with me.

fly high engines buzzin’ and head in my hands
as long as they buzz then we can relax
pick up the bags and light up our flags
come ride the runaway with me.

I’ve lost the reason

Finally an OK calm has fallen over me
poverty and cops with guns have lost their reality
hunker down hunker down and let it
all wash over me
switch off my tv set, is this so bad of me
I got less from fear and feeling bad
there’s something else I need to find
I got more to find

Baby’s gone but there’ll be more
I’m only twenty three
my hair is thin, my size is large, what
have I done to me
pretty soon I’ll fix a drink though I’ve been
told it will kill me

I got less from fear and feeling bad
there’s something else I need to find
I got more to find.

The white noise revisited

Hey! what’s that noise?
do you remember? 
kill yourself at work for what seems nothing at all
then you go home and you cry and you feel so
very small, so you listen to the beatles and relax and close your eyes,
and you feel it running thru you,
feel the hate well up inside

Hey! what’s that noise?
do you remember?
fashioned by the blade of a world that doesn’t care
feeling so removed, drifting thru stealing air then...
pause and think about it, try to move and shift the
scream and feel alive.
Hey! what’s that noise?
do you remember?

Martin Carr 1993